Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Mike Bushnell belongs to the secret society of lit bloggers who work at gas stations

Noo Journal sucks.

Noo Journal does not actually suck.

Someone found my blog by googling "Noo Journal sucks." I told this to Mike Young, who edits Noo Journal, in a gmail chat. He told me that he was the googler. He wanted to see if anyone had ever written "Noo Journal sucks" on the internet.

I told him that I would write Noo Journal sucks on the internet and when he googles "No Journal sucks" again in a year or so, he would come across a link to this blog and feel sad for the second that it took him to determine that it was me.

I like my new car a lot. It is a normal sized car. My last car was an SUV. It was too big. I hated it. It was given to me. It guzzled gas. It had some problem with the fuel system that made it guzzle even more gas than a typical SUV. My new car is very gas efficient. This is very boring. It would be almost impossible to live in my present location without a car. It is too far away from everything. It's also nice not to have to nag people to get rides so I can do errands.

Sometimes when I look at the video surveillance screen in the back of the store, someone is just standing their. Then I run to the front and don't find anybody there. And then I think the place is haunted. And then I go in the back again to look at the video surveillance screen and see the same image. And then I realize that the person on the screen is frozen in time.

I'm going to a bizarro fiction convention in Portland in November. We are all staying in a house that is supposed to be haunted. There is one room where the ghost of a little girl is known to pull on the feet of people while they sleep. That may be my biggest fear. I requested that I didn't sleep in that room. I felt silly doing so. I also said I might be ok with it if I share the room with someone else. I am more afraid of getting insomnia through worrying about my feet getting pulled than the act itself. I like sleep. I need sleep.

I am going to write a post about Tao Lin soon. I like Tao Lin's writing a lot. I've always been a little afraid of writing a post about Tao Lin. I feel like the best way to get Tao Lin to read an entry in your blog is to write "Tao Lin" in your blog entry. If you write "Tao Lin" in every blog entry, it's almost like he's added you to his google reader subscriptions.

I'm being silly. I google my own name too.

I read his blog, but I don't want to link to him on my "writers with blogs" thing because everybody links to him. I don't want to be like everybody else.

Teenage rebellion...or late twenties rebellion.

Plus he probably wouldn't ever link me back.

I added a bunch of links to writers a couple of weeks ago. People I read. People who are in the next issue of Bust. People who are not Tao Lin.


Brad D. Green said...

I'm not Tao Lin. You can link to me.

Jess Gulbranson said...

Wait, where the hell are you staying, Sands?

Bradley Sands said...

I hate the name Brad. Were you the hunky football captain in high school? I bet you're pumping gas now. Oh wait...that's me.

Well, I don't actually pump gas. I press buttons to allow customers to pump gas.

Jess: I am living in a rural area of Western Massachusetts. It's a ten minute drive to civilization.

Brad D. Green said...

The name does carry that connotation, yes. But no, I was a corduroy-wearing dork of the highest order. The Jedi of dorks. Not pumping gas, no. I manage an IT department of a local govt agency. I push a different sort of button. Sometimes two.

Jess Gulbranson said...

No, I meant what haunted house are you staying at in PDX? Just curious. Hopefully we'll get to bump elbows and drink well-spiked Earl Grey at the Bizarro Con.

Bradley Sands said...

The Ad House in Edgefield. Aren't you coming? I think that's where everything is going down.

Jess Gulbranson said...

Well yeah, I'm coming. But I'm not staying at the EDGEFIELD. Not all of us are successful authors, you know. It's a good thing I live in Portland. Pahlaniuk and I will have to settle on sharing a room at the Heathman. He gets the couch.

Bradley Sands said...

Hurray! Machete fight!

ryan manning said...

thank you for linking me

Bradley Sands said...

You're welcome.