Tuesday, June 17, 2008


I think I'm addicted to email. The little ding that Outlook Express whenever I get new mail gives my brain a feeling of joy. The little icon that appears on the right corner of my computer screen gives me brain a feeling of joy, but not as much joy as the little ding. On Myspace, the red color of the "New Mail" text also gives my brain a feeling of joy, but not as much joy as the little ding, although more joy than the little icon that appears on the right corner of my computer screen.

Right now, Outlook Express checks for new mail every five minutes. I used to have it at one minute, but I find that it slows down avi files whenever I'm trying to watch them.

Sometimes I can't wait a whole five minutes. Sometimes I press the "Send/Recv" button myself and check it manually.

I don't think I would get as much joy out of the little ding if I received a lot of spam. But I don't get a lot of it, even though my email address is listed in various places on the internet. I probably get like three or four spam emails a day, and the majority of them are usually related to fiction. I don't mind those so much, although I don't think this is the best strategy for authors to sell their books.

I have an alternative email account that is used to receive spam. Whenever I sign up with a website who I think might spam me, I give them that address.

I also have a bunch of other email addresses. I should just stop using them when I get a new email address, but I never do this. I collect email addresses, although I have forgotten most of them.

I just pressed the "Send/Recv" button. I did it without thinking. It is like second nature to me. It is a very annoying habit. I think I do it because of my extremely short attention span, which has been shrinking more and more throughout my life.

I think that I'm addicted to email because I'm waiting for the one email that will change my life. I have not received it yet, although I have received a few that have changed my life to a minor degree. I think that I might have thought some of these would have a major impact on my life after reading them for the first time, but as time progressed, I realized that this was not the case.

I think I'm being very unrealistic when I think that a single email will change my life. I think that I should think more realistically. I think that a series of email can change my life.

I just pressed the "Send/Recv" button again. I don't know what wrong with me tonight. Maybe I'm always like this but don't realize it because I'm not writing about it? Maybe I have some weird form of OCD that is only related to computers?

Obviously, emailing me is the best way to get in contact with me. I hate getting phone calls. There is something that I dread about them. They are very intrusive. Also, whenever I turn on my cell phone and find out that I have a message or two, I get afraid. I associate phone calls with dramatic seriousness and the emails with fun. I like calling people though. I am a hypocrite. Except I don't like making dramatic serious phone calls. I don't like calling people at work about a bill or whatever. I just like calling to shoot the shit.


Josh Maday said...

i am addicted in an OCD way to these things:


i go through these things and then the cycle begins again almost immediately. i feel embarrassed to be so vain and neurotic, etc. but that will not keep me from checking obsessively.

ditto on not liking the phone to ring. whether or not it is true, i always feel like someone wants to complain or wants something from me in some way. usually that is not the case, but that is how the dread feels when my phone rings.

Bradley Sands said...

So you check your Amazon sales rank a lot too? Noticed you have an e-book.

I don't actually have a stat counter for this blog, but I do for this website.

I don't like facebook, except for scrabble thing.

Josh Maday said...

yeah, i think the ebook has sold once. big bucks.

i don't like facebook or myspace, but i still check them a lot. that might be sad.

Bradley Sands said...

I think myspace is only good for promotion. And meeting Mike Young, who is the only friend that I've made through myspace.

Josh Maday said...

Yes, Myspace has done some good for me. I met Michael Kimball through it, and that's worth it right there. And, you know, I think I met you through it, too, so it's actually been much more valuable to me than facebook. Still, I don't like how I could spend an entire day on those sites if I allowed myself. Mike Young is a cool dude. That's cool that you guys live close to each other. Or did he move? I thought I read that he was moving. I don't know.

Bradley Sands said...

Oh right. I forgot about you. Probably because you could have just emailed instead of messaging me on myspace since I think you wrote to say that you liked my story in Lamination Colony. Mike contacted me out of the blue.

Mike lives about fifteen minutes away from me by car, in the town where I used to live. We swapped towns. I don't think I've seen him since last month though.

Josh Maday said...

Yup, I think you're right that I messaged you about your work in Lamination Colony. Yeah, I could have just emailed you.


i think very much like this re: email and phones. it probably contributes to my insomnia. yikes

Josh Maday said...

yes, i've seen the hours tick away as i go through the cycle OCD fashion just one more time, and thirty times later i am moving past tired and getting nothing done.