Wednesday, April 16, 2008

obesity

Is there a sports team called The Rhinoceroses?

A few hours ago, an obese man came into my work wearing a Rhinoceroses jersey. I thought this was a little funny. It is like when someone gets made fun of for something in high school and they appropriate the insults that they receive on a daily basis. I like this.

The jersey might have just said Rhinoceros or Rhinos. I don't know. I don't remember. My memory is terrible.

He was leaning over a little and I tried to read the text on the back. I was able to make out the first word or two. I forget what they were.

I was playing a CD compilation of industrial bands covering songs from the eighties.

Industrial covers usually send much better than industrial originals because whoever wrote the song that the cover is based on was probably a much better writer than the members of the industrial band. And industrializing any songs makes it sound badass.

Xorcist's cover of Party Like It's 1999 was playing.

The man in the rhinoceros jersey asked me if it was a Korn remix.

I said, No, it is a Prince cover.

He said, I know that.

I said, it is Xorcist. Exorcist with an X at the beginning.

He said, Oh, it sounds like Jonathan Davis.

I thought to myself, No, it does not sound like Jonathan Davis. It sounds like a vacuum cleaner who has been taught to sing.

The man in the rhinoceros jersey left.

I forgot what he bought. The only thing that I remember is a chocolate bar. He seemed to feel guilty about buying it. The other stuff that he bought is not relevant. The chocolate bar is not relevant.

None of this is relevant.

Nothing is relevant.

2 comments:

BLAKE BUTLER said...

rhinoceroses. i would watch that team.

probably not.

nothing like talking to people where you work.

Bradley Sands said...

Hello, Blake.

I will mention something else to you here. You will probably not care, but I do not feel like adding it to the original entry. I hope you enjoy it. I will be fine if you do not.

Leæther Strip do the greatest industrial covers. I had to google that name to cut-and-paste the weird ae thing. I guess Leæther Strip is a "project" rather than a "band" because it is only one guy. Industrial musicians tend to like being in bands with only themselves.


Leæther Strip used to be great. They had really good original songs. Then the Leæther Strip guy came out of the closet. Then perhaps coincidentally, his music became pretty bad. I guess he was all angsty before closet excursion, and all non-angsty after. Even though the music continued to be angsty. I think perhaps it was a false angsty. I guess in industrial land, false angst=an inability to write a decent song.

But Leæther Strip have done a lot of covers since the closet excursion, and they are all excellent. I think this proves my industrial cover hypothesis, whatever the hell that was about.