a blog entry

Remember when I used to write a blog entry nearly every day? I liked doing that. I miss it. I think I was compensating for not writing very much fiction.

I don't have much motivation to write in this thing anymore.

I'm looking forward to moving away and changing my lifestyle, which has become intolerable ever since I found out that it would be changing. Time has never moved so slowly.

The "great submissions project" is finished, I guess. Submitting is fun. Now I see why everybody does it so much.

I hate the last bunch of prose poems that I wrote, so I'm probably not going to do it anymore. I'm in a funk again. I took a break from writing them for a couple of weeks because I had to work on an essay and I sent my laptop in for repair and I didn't feel comfortable writing the poems in a notebook.

Now I have my laptop again and I wrote a few poems and they are no good.

So I tried to start a story and it was no good.

I don't know where to send my stories anyway. I feel like I need a place to target to motivate me to write.

I like submitting to online journals over print. It's easier to get accepted into good online places than good print places. Because online places are more adventurous than print. I think my poems are for online and my stories are for print. My stories usually end up long, and I don't submit long online.

I'm going to start a new novella tomorrow night. It will be literary fiction, then it will not be. I don't have a good title yet. Ron Loewinsohn's Magnetic Field(s) has inspired me to write it. I wonder if it also inspired Blake Butler and Mark Z. Danielewski.

I wonder if the novella actually end up being a book rather than something short and unfinished. I already have a couple of "books" like that. I've met a lot of people with books like that. They are usually written by people who have never completed a novel before. I ask, "How far along are you?" They say, "Like five pages." A couple of months later and it's still "like five pages." I say, "Why don't you write a short story? Short stories are easier to write." They usually haven't really written any shorts. So many people want to write novels without first doing shorter work and end up biting off more than they can chew. I think there should be another term that should be used for the "I am working on a novel" sentence if the novel is in its early stages. "I am working on a THING THAT WILL PROBABLY NEVER GET DONE AND I WILL PROBABLY WRITE VERY LITTLE OF."

I'm not going to talk about my plots anymore. Getting paranoid.

Fuck this blog entry.

Interview with Ryan Manning for thunk.

Dragons with Cancer

Mike Young and I have released Dragons with Cancer, an e-anthology of real and irreal stories.

It includes stories by Blake Butler, Ray Fracalossy, Avital Gad Cykman, Sam Pink, Gina Ranalli, Sean Kilpatrick, Rhys Hughes, Ofelia Hunt, Andersen Prunty, and Kevin L. Donihe.

READ IT HERE

online journals that I "co-founded" are seeking submissions

Wamack: A Journal of the Arts:

Send your weird fiction to grantwamack@gmail.com

Word length:1-3000 words.

What we want: weird fiction, bizarro, absurd and anything else that fits in-between these genres. Well-written tales are expected. Stories that flow nicely. We want pieces of art or at least something resembling art.

Kek-W Quarterly:

5 - 350 words.

Any language.

Looking for originality and a unique voice. Duh.
Some sort of emotional impact, even if oblique or intangible.
A narrative thread rather than just words thrown together.
A mood, atmosphere, flava, vibe.

Prose rather than Trad. Poetry.

Points given for combining genres, formats: show me something I've never seen before. But no experimentation for experimentation's sake.

I reserve the right to contradict myself or ignore any of the above at any point that I feel like.

If I reject your submission it doesn't mean that you or your work suck; it just means I, oh, you know...

If sending v. short pieces, then send several.

kekw10cc [at] googlemail [dot] com

Mall Security

Oh man. This is awesome: www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekAQzff95E8

"Bi-polar mall security guard Ronnie Barnhardt is called into action to stop a flasher from turning shopper's paradise into his personal peep show. But when Barnhardt can't bring the culprit to justice, a surly police detective, is recruited to close the case."

Have an idea for a movie? Write a treatment. Release it into the netherworld. Hollywood will do the rest.

Well, just the bi-polar mall security guard thing. I based my treatment on a story that I wrote two summers ago. Used it as a writing sample for my MFA applications. Where the fuck did I send it? (Checking my tracker on Duotrope). I think the guy who wrote the screenplay either considers applicants for an MFA program or edits for Fence or edits for McSweeney's (who haven't responded yet) or edits for Columbia: A Journal of the Arts or is Mike Young.

Well, at least this movie looks good. Unlike that Paul Blart shit. I want to see this one. I will imagine that my movie magically appeared.

Here's a list of my top ten favorite novellas: www.johnmadera.com/2009/04/bradley-sandss-top-ten-favorite.html.

And other lists by all of these people courtesy of John Madera:

Leni Zumas
John Dermot Woods
Kevin Wilson
William Walsh
Justin Taylor
Joe Stracci
Matthew Simmons
David Shields
Peter Selgin
Christine Schutt
Bradley Sands
Tim Russell
Adam Robinson
Cooper Renner
Kathryn Regina
Ben Pester
Kimberly King Parsons
Ben Myers
Clayton Moore
Carole Maso
Michael Martone
Micheline Aharonian Marcom
John Madera
Lorette C. Luzajic
Gary Lutz
Sean Lovelace
Reb Livingston
Catherine Lacey
Lee Klein
Paul Kincaid
Michael Kimball
Sean Kilpatrick
Michael Joyce
Shane Jones
Jac Jemc
Jamie Iredell
Lily Hoang
Christopher Higgs
John Haskell
Jim Hanas
Amelia Gray
Brandon Scott Gorrell
Renee Gladman
Molly Gaudry
Timothy Gager
Brian Evenson
Scott Esposito
Nicolle Elizabeth
Jackie Corley
Jimmy Chen
Tobias Carroll
Blake Butler
K. Kvashay-Boyle
Daniel Borzutzky
Crispin Best
Matt Bell
Ken Baumann
Nick Antosca
J.R. Angelella
Steve Almond

stick a fish in your ear

A few new prose poems:

"A Sloth and the Newspaper Boy" in Wamack: A Journal of the Arts

"A Headless Man Falls in Love with a Bowl of Rice" in Magazine of the Dead.

"The Man with Penis Breath" (where I totally rip off Russell Edson) in Every Tree Has a Face

Anyone else?

I found a review of the current issue of Bust Down the Door and Eat All the Chickens. I like translating things with Babel Fish. It's always funny:

A review published by Bradley Sands, who proposes absurd news, surrealist and bizarro. In this number, a few great purple passages: - " Bang bang" , d' Adam Breckenridge: sympathetic. Not trascendant, but sympathetic. - " We witnessed the advent off has off new apocalypse during year episode Friends" , of Blake Butler: a news based on an idea with the idiot: and if you look at the TV during l' appearance of the first signs of l' Apocalypse, and that those did occur during a épidode from Friends? Funny. - " Chocolate Caramello candy bars and yoohoo drinks" of Darby Larson: the main character of this news has two characteristics: he is busy (in the purest style, in other words, he saw his life while doing nothing but pass) and especially lorsqu' he skirts his hand in the pocket of his trousers, he always arises with the sum d' money which it needs at the time. A sympathetic news, too. - " Castle Cesare" of Rhys Hughes: probably the best news of the review, which starts with " I believe that I am the only living being to have really two ages. J' have at the same time 28 years and 9.731.065 ans." A beautiful news, poetic, surrealist, barred in its head. If you should not read qu' a news of this review (what would be a pity frankly, because the others are very well also), it must be that one. - " Because accident" d' Ofelia Hunt. A very short news, very shock. After that of Rhys Hughes, my preferred news of this delivery. The Web site: http://www.absurdistjournal.com/ To note that this site proposes some numbers in remote loading, as well as small anthos. So long for new adventures; -)

The Great Submissions Project

Another prose poem in Kek-W Quarterly.

Other submissions so far:

"A Suicidal Amputee Tries to Kill Himself by Rolling Off His Bed, Down the Stairs, Through the Screen Door, and Into Traffic; Some Dominican Kids Poke Him With Sticks Too, and an Eagle Shits on Him" to Jereme: A Journal of Dean Fiction. Response - The editor said it was awesome. No mention of publication. Assumed rejection. I am perplexed. I will probably submit it elsewhere.

"Brave Contestant of Faith" to xTx's Internet Tendency. Response - Confirmation received. The editor said she liked it. Again, I am perplexed. An editor has never told me they liked a submission in the confirmation email. Editor also requests I continue to drink awesome sauce. I think this might be a good sign, but I don't know.
Update (10:57 AM)- It has been accepted.

"A Texas Cowboy and His Pal, The Jeanie, on Vacation" to Chiaroscuro. Response: Not yet received. Have been waiting an hour and fifty minutes. Starting to feel anxious.

Poems I still need to write:

"Diners and/or Dinosaurs and/or Diaphragms" for Noo Journal. I will write this tomorrow so I won't be interrupted. I have the night off. I also have the next night off. I will start my Steve Erickson essay then. If I do not feel like writing prose poems during this time, The Great Submissions Project may go on a short hiatus.

"A Headless Man Falls in Love with a Bowl of Rice" for Magazine of the Dead.

"A Sloth and the Newspaper Boy" for Wamack: A Journal of the Arts

Anyone else?

my salami has a first name

The new issue of The Dream People is out: www.dreampeople.org

The Dream People=Awesome

I have a story in there. I wrote it the night before David Foster Wallace's suicide, so I'm a psychic. It was tasteless of me to submit it, but not tasteless of me to write it.

I just started writing one prose poetry story a day. Depending on my level of concentration, it takes me an hour or two to do. It took me a while to get started because I've been having major TMJ head pain. And days when I suffer from major TMJ head pain are days that do not exist.

My first poem was accepted for the next issue of Mud Luscious. Thanks J.A. for doing that and for giving me the title/subject.

My second poem was accepted for The Brandi Wells Review: brandiwellsreview.blogspot.com. Thanks Brandi Wells for doing that and for giving me the title/subject matter.

Tonight, if tonight exists, I will write a poem for Jereme: A Journal of Dean fiction. It will be called "A Suicidal Amputee Tries to Kill Himself by Rolling Off His Bed, Down the Stairs, Through the Screen Door, and Into Traffic; Some Dominican Kids Poke Him With Sticks Too, and an Eagle Shits on Him."

I think I'm going to start playing the submissions game like all of you guys. I seems like it would be fun. I'm usually not a big submitter. Maybe one story a month. I don't care about getting shorts published as much as getting motivated. Knowing that a person likes something enough to publish it is good motivation to write more.

I like writing prompts. If anyone has one, I will write a poem for you and submit it to your lit journal, regardless of whether or not you actually have one.